The Compass and Mirror of WHY

Have you ever been on a treadmill, promising yourself you’ll stick it out for 30 minutes, and then spending the entire time sneaking looks at the clock? Or told yourself you’d run a few miles and suddenly every step feels like ten?

We’ve all been there. The workout isn’t really the problem….it’s the feeling of watching time drag by with no fuel to carry you through.

Here’s where my unofficial title comes in: “Dr. of Bad Analogies and Metaphors”. Change is a lot like exercise.

• The what is the treadmill itself.

• The how is your running shoes.

• But the why… well, the why has layers.

Sometimes it’s as simple as a playlist that keeps you moving. But the deeper why is what gets you back on the treadmill in the first place:

• You want to stay healthy as you age.

• You want the strength to do that big hike on vacation.

• You want to run a 5K alongside your child.

The why doesn’t just give us energy - it also acts ask as a filter for decisions.

If my why is “run a half marathon with my friends for our big birthday” then it shapes how I move through resistance. On the nights I’m tempted to stay up late, I choose bed because I know I’ll feel and do better running in the cool morning air. Your why is both a compass and a mirror. It keeps you aligned to your goals and desires, and when you’re off track, it becomes a map back to why you’re not in joy or getting what you want.

That’s the difference between surviving the workout and actually caring about it.

I had to remind myself of the same thing during this move. The first three weeks, I was just grinding through the logistics…working, eating, moving my body, and going to bed to do it all over again. I was like a robot and the days all seemed to just meld together. I noticed where I was in this cycle when I kept forgetting what day it was! Without the why, I was wishing away my days, hoping to “just get to the end of 6 weeks”. I wasn’t failing, just not using the most important asset I had in this period as fuel.

When I remembered my deeper why—this season alone is a chance to listen to my body, get curious about what I want, and even play—the same hours felt different. A reminder to stop numbing or pushing anymore and be present. It’s not an accident that is also where this Substack started. My reflection of being a human DOING vs. a human BEING. So this weekend I started a new course online, went to a fragrance making event in a new community, and bought a ticket to go hug my family next weekend. Following my why.

The same is true in corporate change. Most resistance isn’t about difficulty. It’s about disconnection. When people are told to “buckle down and do more” on top of an already full plate, it feels like running endlessly with no reason—resentment at best, defense or collapse at worst.

But when the why gets clear—when people can see what the change makes possible for them—energy returns. On my team, I think of one colleague who is arguably our most knowledgeable about data. She’s nearing retirement in a few years. If the message to her is just “do more campaigns in a new system,” why would she lean in? In fact, she is defensive because a new system means she is not as efficient and won’t be able to crank out as much work. But if the why becomes about leaving a legacy, shaping the bridge from current state to future state, and teaching others what only she knows—that’s a why she could believe in. The resistance could shift into contribution.

Whether it’s a move or a migration, without the why, we can grit through in our stories and wish away our time. With it, we can actually live the time we’re in—curious, connected, and experiencing what matters at each step.

So here’s the reflection for this week:

• Where are you wishing away time right now?
• What’s your deeper why beneath that moment? Not just the surface fuel, but the vision of what matters to you.
• And if you’re leading others through change, are you meeting them in their deeper why—or only handing them another what?

Because the road will always be bumpy, the treadmill always a little tiring. But when you know your real why—the health, the hike, the legacy—you’ll find the perspective to enjoy the journey and to keep going.